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Secular or Modern Wedding Checklist

14 items across 2 categories to plan your Secular or Modern wedding, in the order they come up.

Preparation Phase (6-12 months before)

This is a checklist for planning a contemporary secular wedding.

Tradition

  • Book Officiant

    Find and book a secular celebrant or a justice of the peace, or have a friend get ordained online. Meet to talk about the structure of the ceremony, especially if you are blending traditions from both partners.

  • Book Ceremony and Reception Venue

    Book your venue or venues. Modern weddings take place in places as varied as barns, rooftops and forests. Check for any restrictions on noise, fire or decor.

  • Write Personal Vows

    Write your vows. It can help to agree on guidelines together, such as length and tone, so the two sets of vows fit well together. Practice reading them aloud.

  • Obtain Marriage License

    Apply at the local clerk's office. Check the processing times, expiration dates and any waiting periods in your jurisdiction.

  • Book DJ or Band

    Hire a DJ or live band for the ceremony, the cocktail hour and the reception. Give them a list of songs to play and songs not to play.

  • Book Photographer and Videographer

    Hire a professional photographer and videographer. Talk through the shot list, whether you want a first look, and the key moments.

  • Choose Ceremony Readings

    Choose poems, excerpts or original writing for the ceremony readings. Ask your chosen readers well in advance.

  • Plan Unity Ritual (If Desired)

    Choose and prepare the materials for a unity ritual. If you are blending traditions, talk with your officiant about how to bring several elements together in one ceremony.

  • Discuss Cultural Traditions

    Talk openly with your partner and your families about which cultural elements to include. Look into the origins of any tradition you borrow, and the protocols that go with it.

Wedding Day Checklist

These are the things to confirm and have ready on the day.

Wedding Day

  • Bring Marriage License

    Make sure the license is at the venue and easy to reach for signing after the ceremony.

  • Confirm Rings

    Check that both wedding rings are with the designated ring bearer or the best man.

  • Pack Vow Cards

    Make sure the printed or handwritten vow cards are with you.

  • Confirm All Vendors

    Do a quick check with the caterer, florist, DJ or band, photographer and officiant.

  • Prepare Send-Off Materials

    Set up sparklers, confetti or other send-off materials, along with safety supplies such as lighters and water buckets for disposing of the sparklers.

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